


The Long Journey of a Timeless Relationship

by psychninaaa



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Darillium (Doctor Who), Episode Fix-It: s04e08 Silence in the Library, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Lesbian Sex, Lesbian Thirteenth Doctor, Old Married Couple, Post Darillium, Post-Episode: 2015 Xmas The Husbands of River Song, Post-Library River Song, River Song Appreciation Day, River Song is Saved, Romance, Singing Towers of Darillium, Some Plot, Some angst, Some smut but not explicit, Space Wives, Thirteenth Doctor Era, Time Tots | Babies (Doctor Who), Twelfth Doctor Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24069430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/psychninaaa/pseuds/psychninaaa
Summary: River and the Doctor are finally about to begin their lives as a married couple, and more than ever, he wants to show her that even though he is not very good with displays of affection he loves her unconditionally. Forever, just him and her.
Relationships: The Doctor & River Song, The Doctor/River Song, Thirteenth Doctor & River Song, Thirteenth Doctor/River Song, Twelfth Doctor & River Song, Twelfth Doctor/River Song
Comments: 8
Kudos: 49





	1. The Beginning of the Night

**Author's Note:**

> The events narrated here happen right after The Husbands of River Song. Also, if people are here solely for Thirteen, she first appears in the 4th chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "She calls for you tonight  
> To share this moonlight  
> You'll flow down her river  
> She'll ask you and you'll give her  
> Lips like sugar  
> Sugar kisses"
> 
> Echo & The Bunnymen

The sun had barely begun to set and it would still take years until it did so. There, in that alien planet, with those towers singing, The Doctor kissed River for the first time. At least for this regeneration it was really the first – “bow-tie” had done it as many times as possible.

“What do you truly think?” River looks at the Doctor, amazed. “Of my new me!” He gestures with a hand before his face. “Sweetie, I’ve loved it.” The Doctor smiles fondly and she says shyly, “You know, to be honest, I truly believed I’d see you for only a couple of hours before you’ve vanished.” He responds by stroking her hair gently and utters the next words lovingly “I would never let you slip through my fingers again, not before I’ve allowed us to build something, once and for all.” River stares at the towers, overwhelmed. “Well, that’s new. Romance was never your forte.”

“Don’t you like it?” She continues to face the monoliths. “I do. It’s a shame you weren’t very much into it in your other body.” She smiles at him and jokingly remarks, “You were much more passionate.” The Doctor takes her by her hand and whispers in her ear, “Sweetie, I’m still passionate”. She laughs intently, but knows something is still bothering him. They go to their table, and they dine while the towers keep singing that beautiful but melancholy song. For the first time ever not one of them can stop smiling, for what it was and for what’s to come. His contentment is a constant presence as if nothing evil could touch them there. Her being there in all her indomitable beauty fills him with the urge to run somewhere else where they can be alone, just him and her, closer to each other, more intimate.

When both feel satiated he grabs her by the hand and guides her to the Tardis. And there, he holds her as if the night would end at that instant. He embraces her and never wishes to let go. It had been a long time since he held her like that. He needs her just as much as she needs him. After so many desolate years and so much desperation, what with Clara and everything that happened thereafter, she is the song he really needed to hear. He knows their time is short and will eventually come to an end, and he feels the urge to scream to the heavens above why it has to be like this. Why can’t he just cancel the imminent end that awaits her? Rules had been broken before in countless ways, by himself. But this time the universe needs something in return for all the other times the Doctor disobeyed its laws and her sacrifice will guarantee that their timelines remain intact. The beginning of their story is actually her end. Just the thought of it makes him weak on the knees and he holds her tighter.

He rests his head on her shoulder while she plants kisses on his face. He yearned for her for so long and so much. She is here now, but just thinking of letting go is too much. They stand still, holding each other, feeling their heartbeats synchronize, and stay like this for what seems like an eternity in each other’s arms. He kisses her, this time a kiss more passionate than the one he gave her when their night began, and lets her kiss him back. Their lips part and just before the Doctor can even think he tells her, “I missed you so so much.” River studies him, taking the time to observe every little line on this new face. “And I you.”

He rests his head on her shoulder one more time and the tension seems to go away. “And I am truly sorry for what I made you feel before.” River doesn’t really know what to say. She did mean the things she said earlier, when confronted by Flemming, about the Doctor not loving her back. He used to show he cared in so many ways but he never really admitted to his feelings. For her she was just one of the many who had passed through his incredibly long life, just another companion. They got married but out of need not really out of love. “I forgive you, sweetie.”

River plays with one of his curls while he kisses her again. And she knows now he loves her just as much as she loves him. And, oh, how she loves this man. She had never loved anyone like that before and it’s so very good. The feeling of being loved back is so overwhelmingly great she's sure these 24 years will be sang in songs, written in textbooks, told to strangers throughout the universe. Their story together is already a legend, now it will be a religion.

“You really have no idea how I longed for you, have you?” He says when they pause for breath. She has that smile on her face, the complacent one. So, he longed for her. Good. “How long has it been since you’ve seen me last?”, she asks, but the answer makes her a little bit worried. “Oh, say, a thousand years, give or take.” She’s appalled but manages to reply with a smile on her face, “Well, I’m sure you will tell me all about it one day, sweetie.”

The Doctor laughs at her reaction and kisses her forehead while gently caressing her wild mane. “I love you, River, you do know that now, right? I need to know you do.” God, the way he says these things in a Scottish accent is so very sexy, she thinks. River smooches him and takes his cravat off, “I think you will need to give me some more evidence.” And they go to their bedroom, kissing and touching, stumbling upon everything, while at the same time, undressing. First, he takes off the coat, while she manages to unzip the dress. Then, he takes his shoes and his trousers off, while she sits at the edge of the bed, just on her knickers and so very beautiful that he just has to take a moment to admire the view.

“What?” She says bewildered. He takes his vest off. “Well, you… really look amazing.” She can’t help but chortle. “Well, those are amazing powers of observation.” He walks towards her, takes the shirt off and stands in front of her, hands on his hips, grinning and looking ridiculous. “So, River Song, I’m going to ask you one more time: what do you think of this new body?” She laughs and lays on the bed, staring at him with eyes full of lust, “I love it. Now, come here, you ridiculous old man.”

That night they barely slept. And I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t naughty. He knew just what to do to please her and for hours they’ve loved each other like there was no tomorrow. When they were both so exhausted that they couldn’t keep their eyes open anymore, they fell asleep in each other’s arms, smiling, the pain of longing for each other completely washed away.


	2. An Ordinary Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes you get so lonely  
> Sometimes you get nowhere  
> I've lived all over the world  
> I've left every place  
> Please be mine  
> Share my life  
> Stay with me  
> Be my wife"
> 
> David Bowie

Hours later, River had barely awoken from that peaceful sleep when she sees herself wrapped around the Doctor’s arms. The relief comes with a sensation of stupor. She still couldn’t quite believe she’d have years with him right there by her side, the remarkable presence of that figure to which her life had revolved around since she had been born. And more extraordinarily was knowing that he didn’t wish to run away, as it was his habit, since domesticity didn’t suit him very well, not even with Amy and Rory, even though he had tried and failed miserably. 24 years by his side, it sounded like a lie.

She studies his face thoroughly. A new face, marked with lines that told many stories, and still so very gorgeous in all his expression. The nose is prominent, the eyebrows arched, and they make him terrible, elegant and quite ferocious, at the same time. He’s so different from the man he used to be, not only physically, but in his mannerisms and attitudes. He’s much more mature, there’s no doubt about it, and she remembers how her husband could be insufferably childish in his last regeneration. Not that she minded that bit, she used to find it quite charming.

The Doctor awakes and smiles at her. It had been a long time since he let himself sleep properly. He didn’t really need sleep that much, but the exhaustion was unbearable and he found being able to just doze off with no worries in his mind quite comforting. Lately, his sleep had come down to a few short naps. He strongly believed that sleeping was a huge waste of time since so many things could be done with all the time you spent with your eyes firmly closed, dreaming nonsense. He only really slept whenever River was with him. He felt safe by her side and knew he could let himself be vulnerable, especially when he had his nightmares. To be honest, that was one more reason he wasn’t so keen on sleeping. The terrible nightmares. But she always soothed him back to sleep, saying nice things to him, calming him down. She is his safe haven.

“Good morning.” He says it in a gruff voice, still full of sleepiness. River plants a kiss in his lips, and looks at him lovingly. “Morning. Sleep well?” He caresses her hair, while she keeps kissing his cheeks, his nose, his eyes. She could be so soft, his River. And so very full of love. It’s intoxicating and he wants to stay like this for the rest of their 24 years together. “Very well, with you here it's hard not to have a good time.” She lays her head in his chest and starts moving her hand, descending from his torso to his groin. “How much did you miss me, love?” He closes his eyes and breathes deeply. “A lot.”

They make love again. And he kisses her all around, taking his time, letting her give herself to him completely. He loves her with abandon and she returns this love with the same passion. He comes to the conclusion that perhaps he will never be able to love anyone else like this ever again. She is his, and he’ll make sure she knows that in every way he can possibly think. When both are about to climax, he links his mind to hers, and they experience the feeling of being as one, together. He says her name all while she comes and both fall on each other’s arms, ecstatic and full of satisfaction. They embrace and exchange promises of love and affection. And he is rather fond of this new found ability to express his feelings. He didn’t like to do so, but with her it’s just so natural - he doesn’t really feel like the words are empty of meaning. He doesn’t feel weird saying all of those things. And as for her, she feels whole, he makes her life so much better just by being who he is. Their love is pure and mutual and so very good.

The Doctor manages to move and says, “Breakfast?” River opens her eyes dreamily and replies, “Don’t mind if I do.” He stands up and puts on a robe while she sits on the bed and admires him between the sheets. He returns the look. He’s all smiles and can’t help but adore her in all her grandeur. A sun goddess. His goddess. He walks towards her and smooches her. “You do look amazing, you know that?” She chuckles. “Well, if you say so.” He wants to go back to bed – all that power she holds over him is actually infuriating. “Go make me some breakfast, husband.”

River stays in bed, a wide smile spread across her face, she hadn’t felt that happy in ages. Manhattan had happened fairly recently, the memory of her parents stuck in the past had brought her so much suffering. The Doctor had been completely lost for quite some time after it, so much so, that they parted ways because she knew she had to hide the damage. For the Doctor, she imagined it would have been unbearable to see her in pain. So she did what she knew best and ran away. Nevertheless, he managed to find her again, as he always does, and she’s glad he did because she missed him with all her heart. And the best thing about it all was that they would have years ahead of themselves to just be. Just enjoy each other with no worries about absolutely anything. He was all hers, finally. She wouldn’t need to anxiously wait for him not knowing when they’d see each other again. He was there, in all his gloriousness. She is such a lucky woman. She thanks her parents for being born in those mad circumstances, and she thanks the gods above for making her cross her paths with that man she loved so much. 

She decides to stand up, puts on a robe and walks towards the console. She can hear music playing. David Bowie. She had seen some records the night before, and a turntable. This Doctor loved music. Gosh, he had a guitar, too, from what she had seen. She wonders if he had played his way to her. He was such a show off, she knew how much he liked to show people how good he was at everything. “Did you know this album was made to you?” He was listening to 'Low'. She walks up the stairs to him and gives him a heartfelt smile. “What, David Bowie wrote an album to me? I’ve never met the man.” He grins. “Well, I did. I may or may not have helped him write the songs, you know… Gave him some ideas for song titles and all, managed to slip some verses here and there.” She can’t quite believe it. He really was a brag. “How did you two meet?” He grabs a toast on a plate by the console, gives it a big bite and boasts, “I was just passing through the seventies and we stumbled upon each other. We became buddies and I might have used some of my influence, musically speaking, you know. I played in some songs, it’s a shame he didn’t give me the due credits.” River jokes, “Well, you are not modest, that’s for sure.” She sits on one of those jump seats that are so far from the controls and says, “Well, that’s not so convenient, dear. You may want to think about redesigning this.” The Doctor retorts, “But I can always stand up if I need to.” She smiles at his indignity and takes a bite at a toast. 

He leans his back on the console all while staring at her eating and looking at the record. He feels he’ll do that often during the years they’ll have together. He just needs to memorize every single detail of her face and her body. He was such a fool for feeling jealous the night before, with Ramone and Hydroflax. Surely, he can’t quite imagine they had given her what she needed, like he did. Love was what she needed and he showed her just how much he is full of it and how much he is willing to give up just to be by her side. Of course with love came its perks and he does really enjoy having sex with her (maybe this regeneration was a bit rusty, but she didn't complain). And he loved doing it with her because he could truly give himself, all of his mind, and body and soul. And both his hearts. They were only hers. She is a magnificent woman that makes him feel so many things: awe, lust, jealousy, reverence, devotion. And she most definitely makes him rather turned on. Which is not bad at all (even if this regeneration had a bit of a problem with touching and feelings in general), but he's beginning to think this new self will be in constant need of cold showers.

Just as she was about to take another bite at her toast she realizes he’s been staring at her that whole time. “What?” Oh, and there it is, that feeling of want again. There and now. “Just looking.” She stands up and places the rest of the toast on the plate. She giggles and drinks tea from one of the cups on the console. “You are never just looking.” He gives a few steps towards her and places his arms on her hips, bringing her closer. “True.” His hands descend to her bums, which makes her leap in surprise, and he kisses her full of desire. When they take a moment to breathe, she looks down and acknowledges his needs, “Oh. I think someone has just woken up.” He responds humorously, “Well, Mrs. Song, I think you will have to do something about it. And fast.” He picks her up on his arms and leads her to their bedroom, where they spend the rest of that lazy day in each other’s arms, just the two of them, in perpetual adoration.


	3. The Years to Come

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Succumb to the line  
> The finishing time  
> The long distance runner  
> Has stopped on the corner  
> But I won't give up  
> Although I've stopped too  
> Before the end of me and you  
> The patchwork explains  
> The land is unchanged"
> 
> Broadcast

“Do you think you will ever feel tired of all of this?” River asks the Doctor, some weeks after they’ve arrived in Darillium. 

The Doctor is in the console, building a new guitar out of an assortment of electronic parts he gathered from one of the Tardis’ innumerous warehouses. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, I don’t know. Someone might say that it’s because you were never one to stay still.” Bugger. It’s true.

“Well, **now** I want to stay still.” She gives him a sardonic smile. 

“Oh really, and why’s that?” He stops welding a copper wire and looks fixedly at her. 

“Oh, I dunno. There’s this woman who once tried to murder me. Mind you, we fell in love eventually, and then got married in a haste. Spent an aeon apart, but I found her again and she’s been pinning me to bed ever since. It’s been heavenly.” She laughs. 

“Oh, Doctor, be careful, she seems dangerous.” He stands up and walks towards her, a wide smile painting his face. 

“You bet she is.” Holding her, he gently presses a kiss on her lips. She enjoys the fact that he is always finding an excuse to embrace her and show his affection. Before Silver Fox, it was always up to her to snog him, and most of the times Chinny seemed a bit uncomfortable. Now, he just can’t fathom the idea of being an inch apart from her lips. She isn’t complaining.

On some days, River wakes up and finds herself alone in bed. She doesn’t want to disturb whatever the Doctor is doing, and to be honest, it is not really any of her business. Let the old man do his thing. On one of those nights he felt strong enough to talk about the events that led him to her. He told her about Clara. And how he knew she was brilliant and special but just couldn’t remember who she was exactly. And it bugged him a lot.

Of course, River knew about Clara - The Impossible Girl, who saved the Doctor in so many ways and so many times. She really was so very brilliant and magnificent. Being an archaeologist comes in handy and, by digging a little bit, she found some documents mentioning Clara. She was considered a hero in innumerous societies, and at least two or three revered her as a goddess of mischief. Of course, she showed the Doctor everything she could find and he couldn’t help but smile with every mention of his beloved friend. River wished she could have known Clara Oswald in person and thank her for everything she did for their Doctor.

Still, River doesn’t know that during those ‘nights’ she is alone in bed, the Doctor is planning. He’s strategizing, studying, making notes and calculations. He theorized it’s possible to bring bodies back to the physical world, using their conscience, if said conscience is saved in a proper database. It may be a bit tricky and fairly dangerous, but if done properly it might really be possible (and River’s conscience is still out there, saved in the Library’s computer). All the research is done while she’s sleeping because he knows she won’t come barging in the middle of it just to discover the unpleasantness of her death. She doesn’t need to know any of that.

During the following years, as the night falls on Darillium, they spend time going to neighboring planets to explore. In one of those trips, he gifts River with a ring. She is all smiles and playfully remarks, “Oh, Doctor, so it’s serious.” 

He embraces her and grins, “Oh yeah.” He kisses her and she continues teasing him: 

“So, Doctor, now we’re gonna be a serious married old couple?” He laughs. 

“Well, this ring means communion of souls, River Song. Not that thing you had with that bloke Ramone, nor with Hydroflax, for that matter.” She loves when he gets jealous like this – just goes to show how much he means when he tells her she’s his when they’re in bed. He slides the ring on her finger, it’s an exact copy of the one he has. 

“I love it. But, wait a sec! Do I sense a hint of possessiveness, my love?” She breaks from the embrace, holding his hand, and they walk along a paved street located in a very charming city, in a planet not so far from Darillium. He says with a hint of jealousy:

“Maybe… Just a little bit.” What a surprise! 

“So, supposing I told you I still have other husbands, how would that make you feel?” He looks at her, a little anxious. 

“Oh, don’t you dare, River, I’m the only one!” He blinks, a little nervous. “Aren’t I?” She smirks. 

“Well, yes and no.” Now, he’s most definitely panicking. 

“What do you mean yes and no? It’s either one or the other.” She knows how to make him feel lots of emotions, that’s for sure, some not so pleasant. 

“Well, my dear, you have other selves.” His annoyance is just too funny and whenever she teases him by mentioning dates with other of his selves, he just loses everything. 

“Oh, no, no. No, no, no. I refuse to share you with them. I forbid you.” He is such a fool for feeling jealous of himself, it’s pretty absurd. 

“But they’re all you.” Well, they are but at the same time they aren’t, it’s complicated. He says between clenched teeth: 

“I can’t stand imagining bow-tie in bed with you.” She laughs heartily. 

“Well, dear, he was a very good kisser.”

He approaches her ear and whispers, feeling like he is going to explode, “But I make you blush.” True, he does and she is all for it. “Oh, shut up.”

They keep on walking through the streets, and she can see he is very cross, and it makes her laugh even more. 

“Oh come on, sweetie! You’re a ridiculous fool, d’you know that?” She kisses his cheek and he gives her a smile. It’s impossible to feel angry with her for a long time. He takes a deep breath and manages to say calmly: 

“You know… I love you even when you’re trying to irate me.” She replies, feeling amused, “Oh, honey, I do my best.”

They spend all those years in pure bliss, that’s a fact. Nevertheless, there are sad days, too. One day, River is reading a book in the Tardis library, when the Doctor appears next to her, guitar in hands. He has that look on his face that says something was bothering him. She asks a little worried, “What’s the matter, dear?” He sits down next to her. 

“Well, it’s Clara. She’s been bothering me again. I was playing this song I made and now I’m feeling blue again…” River reaches for the Doctor. “I’m sure she is out there somewhere, looking over you, Doctor.” He has his brows furrowed and is playing Clara’s tune. “I made this song for her, even though I have no idea who she is.” He’s strumming the chords while River runs her fingers through his curls. “It’s beautiful.” She plants a kiss in his mess of a hair and lets him vent his frustration.

“I don’t know why I had to forget her but I’m sure there must’ve been a good reason. No. Actually, no. It’s very annoying. It’s extremely annoying not knowing. And then I had to be alone for who knows how long. It was depressing. I felt lost for a long time and only found myself when you appeared to me again.” 

The Doctor lays his head on her lap and River entwines her fingers in his curls. “I’ll always be there for you, my love. Even when we’re not together anymore.”

He closes his eyes, holding back tears. “Don’t say that. We’ll be together for eternity. Darillium is just a stop. There’ll be more after that.”

She bents down and kisses his cheek. “I’m sure there will.” The stories beg to differ. River wonders what might be of him when she’s not there anymore. She’s been thinking about it for quite some time now.

“Can you promise me something, my love?” He looks up at her. “Anything.” She chooses the words carefully because she knows what she has to say, will hurt him a little bit. 

“Can you promise me that you will never travel alone again after I’m gone?” He closes his eyes and sighs. “Please, let’s not even go there yet.” Just the thought of her sitting on that chair sacrificing herself in his place makes his hearts hurt and the pain is too much.

“Doctor, you know what they say about us…” He stops her short. 

“I don’t want to think about it now. Also, how can people be so sure this is it?” She smiles at him: 

“Well, archaeology is a serious business, even though you’re against it.” He furrow his brows and mockingly remarks:

“You know why I’m against it. It’s gossip. I hate gossip.” He bops her nose and stands up, holding out a hand to her. “What do you say about an adventure?”

“Only if that adventure involves me and you, handcuffs, and lots of screaming.” He looks at her feigning shock:

“You are a bad girl, River Song.” River laughs one of those laughs that fills him with a sense of awe and embraces him. 

“Admit it, Doctor, you love it.” He kisses her full of desire. “Never said I didn’t.” 

As the years go by, they live their lives together at the fullest. The Doctor’s plan takes form and now it’s just a question of time. And patience. He will need a lot of it, to be honest. It will be another gift of sorts, one that will bring his River back to him.

Eventually, the day of their farewell arrives and, even though he had 24 years to prepare for it, it’s still difficult thinking of saying goodbye to his wife. As for River, she feels miserable. She knows it’s time to depart, and she tries with all the fiber in her being to be strong. She’ll need to be brave and she doesn’t know if she’ll be able to say goodbye to him. Just thinking of it makes her want to cry and she will not do it, not in front of him. Because she knows he’ll need the strength too. And if she cries, she knows he’ll do everything in his power to make her stay. She’ll have to come to terms with the fact that they won’t see each other ever again. She feels depressed, mostly because this regeneration gave her so much in exchange for so little. He was finally her Doctor.

They spend their remaining hours tightly embraced in each other’s arms, in their bed, exchanging words of love and of comfort. “Will you be okay, my love?” She is making a huge effort to hold back the tears, even though he’s crying. He kisses her warmly and she asks him once again hoping to hell he follows her request, “Please, promise me you will not be alone.” He kisses her more urgently and manages to speak the next words with some difficulty. “I promise.”

When the sun finally rises, he holds her in his arms and it’s so hard to let her go. He knows if he asks her, she’ll stay, but he also knows he can’t change fixed points. She can’t stop looking at him while fastening the vortex manipulator to her wrist. She thinks of all the happy things they’ve had together, all the memories she’ll carry of her Doctor in his Tardis, taking her to all the places she always wanted to be. She wants to bawl her eyes out.

She composes herself and gives the Doctor a kiss. He plants a soft kiss on the back of her hand and he allows himself to weep, the longing already taking place. “I love you.” She is wearing a sad smile. The day is gray. “And I you, my love.” She adjusts the settings and pauses before pressing the button. “Goodbye”.

He can’t say it back, he just can’t. It’s unbearable. So he just waves a hand at her all while whispering ‘I love you’. She vanishes. He enters the Tardis and sinks down onto a chair. He had programmed the calculations into the Tardis so his old girl could make thing happen. He needs things to happen as they always did. River has to go to the Library and that may take a while. Then, he has to wait for the Tardis to finish all the calculations so the program can run smoothly. These are going to be long and painful years to live by. And already, her absence makes him feel worn down. He needs to clear his head, he needs something to do. Maybe he’ll stick Nardole’s head in his body, he just needs to retrieve the body in the past. Yeah, that seems a good idea. He did promise he wasn’t going to travel alone anymore. He is a nice chap, Nardole. Maybe he can even teach him how to travel the Tardis and go on adventures together. Then he can run away for a while. And maybe, just maybe, he can cope with a little help from a friend.


	4. A New Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm like a rocket from a bottle shot free  
> I've been just explosive since you lit me  
> I've been up with the larks  
> I've been shooting off sparks  
> And I'm feeling in love"
> 
> XTC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter happens right after season 11 ends.

The Doctor regenerated but she hasn’t forgotten about the plan, nor did the Tardis – the calculations were completed fairly recently. And, to make things even better, she is actually much more confident in this body that things will be fine and the plan will succeed. She can’t wait to put things into action. Then, one day, after one of the many adventures she’s had with Yaz, Ryan and Graham, the Tardis beeped with a message. Time had finally come to try and free River from the database. The Doctor smiles one of those big smiles and says to herself “Well, then, let’s go!” She sets the coordinates to the Library and pulls the lever. “I’m pretty hopeful. Like that – Doctor of hope. Suits me.”

Upon arriving at the planet, she uses the Tardis programs to scan for signs of life. The minute she turns it on, the monitor beeps nonstop. “Guess I’ll have to pay double, no, not double, triple… no, quadruple attention. Those nasty Vashta Nerada are still all around,” she tells herself as she steps out of the ship, sonicing the surroundings. On her other hand she has an array of cables she’ll need to bring River back - she’ll use the Tardis as a source of energy. She’ll need lots of it for the process to be successful. She also has a gadget she’ll use to communicate with River inside the program.

“Wish me luck, girl,” she says to the ship and starts pacing quickly, paying close attention to the shadows all around her. She arrives at the room where Charlotte, the computer that runs the planet’s database, is resting. Charlotte opens her eyes and says: 

“Hello! My name is Charlotte, what’s yours?”

“Hello, there, Charlotte! I’m the Doctor. Remember me?” The little girl looks puzzled.

“I remember you, you helped me save people.”

“I did. How are you, Charlotte?”

“I’m fine. Wait… You’re a girl!”

“Is that bad?”

“You were different when you came here before. You were a boy!”

“Yeah, got an update.”

“You seem nicer than him.”

“Oh, well, lots of things happened and now I’m the nicest person to hang out with. You’ll see. Hey, mind if I take a look at your database? Won’t take long.” Charlotte pays close attention to this little woman, a rather curious creature.

“Why, miss Doctor?”

“Well, I’m here to help someone. And that someone is part of you now.”

“Oh, who is it?”

“River Song.”

At the mention of the name, Charlotte beams. “She talks about you when she tucks me to bed.”

“Really? Good things?”

“She tells me stories and you are the hero in all of them.”

“Oh, don’t believe the hype. Look, can I…?” She gestures to the computer and Charlotte winks, so the Doctor takes it as a yes. She plugs the gadget, which is something between a headphone and a radio, into the computer, types some things and presses enter. She concentrates on a thought, the only thought that matters, the only name she can ever think about. And the reply is almost automatic, the words written on the screen filling the Doctor with love and longing, “Hello, sweetie.”

The Doctor proceeds to type frenetically and, with every word, she can’t stop feeling two things at the same time: one, happiness. Soon, everything will be fine again. The other feeling is worry. She sonics the surroundings again, scanning for the Vashta Nerada. Nothing, so far.

So far.

“River, I have to hurry. We don’t have a lot of time. Bringing you back to life. Don’t worry, won’t hurt a bit.”

The reply comes instantly. “What? How?”

“No time to explain. Love you!”

The Doctor takes the headphones out and proceeds to plug the cables into the computer, all while Charlotte watches.

“Ok, so, Charlie, I’ll need your help. Are you a brave girl?”

“Yes, I’m the bravest girl of all.”

“Right. When I’m ready I need you to run the commands I’m typing in your system right now. Can you do it?”

“Will it hurt?”

“Nah, not a bit. But you need to concentrate. Can you do this for me?”

“Yes, I think I can.”

“Alright, just a sec… Okay! Done. Ready?”

Charlotte winks at the Doctor and when she presses enter, and the program starts running. The Artron energy, coming straight from the Tardis console through the cables, being the source of energy needed for the process to run the smoothest way possible. The Doctor begins to panic a bit, because her sonic is now beeping, meaning the Vashta Nerada took notice of her here.

The whole thing doesn't take more than a few minutes, but minutes are an eternity given the circumstances, and the Doctor can’t help but press a hand through her forehead, “Oh, come on, hurry!”

Then, with a flash of light and a sudden jolt, there she was. River. “Oh my stars, It’s ok, it’s ok, just breathe, River, breathe, that’s it, good.” River is lying on the floor, in a beautiful dress, her wild mane covering a bit of her face. She opens her eyes, blinks lots of times and when her eyes focus on the face looking down at her, she can only say, “I hate you.”

The Doctor chuckles, smugness and a sense of accomplishment filling her. “No, you don’t.”

“Loved the hair, sweetie.”

“Really? I was thinking of dying it ginger.” The Doctor helps River stand up and compose herself.

“Oh, don’t you dare. I love a blondie. Your blond incarnations were amazing kissers.” 

The Doctor blushes and tries to say something, but before she can, River jumps on her and kisses her. She is aghast and shouts, “River!” The Doctor is positively stunned, but a bit embarrassed, and whispers the next words:

“There are kids here.”

River looks at Charlotte and a great sense of warmth and love fills her entire body. “Charlotte, my dear! It’s great to see you in real life again.”

“Are you going to leave me, ma’am?”

“Just for a while, dear. But I promise I’ll come round.” Charlotte, being only a kid and with a history of people abandoning her, does what only an abandoned child can do, which is crying. The Doctor knew this would probably happen - with River being so good at taking care of whoever happened to cross her way, it's only natural that she had quickly become a mother figure to Charlotte -, and types some more things in the computer’s keyboard.

“Charlie, she won’t ever be gone. Look, I made something just for you.”

She presses enter and it takes a while, but the girl soon stops crying.

“I made a River just for you. She’ll continue to take care of everyone there.” 

Charlotte smiles at the two women standing in front of her. “Thank you, Doctor, I knew you were a nice girl.”

“Oh, don’t mention it. Now, go to sleep, Charlie. It was nice seeing you again.”

“Alright. Goodbye, Doctor. Goodbye, River.”

“Goodbye, sweetie. Have sensational dreams.”

The Doctor looks at the sonic screwdriver, beeping incessantly, and urges River to run. “Now, River, you know how I like a bit of danger, right?”

River chuckles, “Unfortunately.”

“Okay, so, we have to run. Like, now.” She grabs the cables on one hand and River by the other, and runs like hell. All the while shadows are nearing them with their every step. As soon as they barge into the Tardis, the Doctor pulls the lever as fast as she can and the ship enters the time vortex. She parks the Tardis there, and finally breathes. And starts laughing like a mad woman. River can’t help but laugh, too.

“Are you okay, sweetie?”

“Me? Oh, yes, I’m swell. You?”

“Oh, never better.”

“Great. I thought we could stay here a bit, you know, away from danger and bad aliens who eat people.”

“Yeah, that seems like a nice idea.”

The Doctor composes herself, and wipes her tears. It had been years since she laughed so much she cried. She looks at River and says, a little embarrassed:

“So…”

“Uhm, when did you change again?”

“After Angry Scotsman.”

“Oh, I see.”

“Do you like it?”

“Do I like it, Doctor? I love it!” River walks towards the Doctor and teases her with the kind of innuendo that now makes her blush, “Told you, blond you is a fabulous kisser.”

She grabs the Doctor by the coat and kisses her for quite some time, only pausing for breath. And they can’t help crying happy tears. 

“I thought I’d never see you again. You were so young, you didn’t recognize me.” 

The Doctor wipes away River’s tears with her tiny fingers. “I’m so sorry. You know how time travelling can sometimes be messy.”

“Don’t I know?”

“And I couldn’t risk bringing you back before everything’s happened in the right order. Sorry it took so long.”

“Oh, don’t worry, dear. It was fun. Did you know there’s a nice fellow inside the program called Doctor Moon?”

“Really? Wonder if it’s something to do with me.”

“Spoilers!”

The Doctor hugs River and stays like that for quite some time. She is so petite, this new Doctor. River is glad of the change, even though she misses Silver Fox with all her being. She caresses the Doctor’s hair and plants kisses on her forehead.

“Now, sweetie, how did you manage to bring me back?”

“While we were in Darillium, I started researching a way of bringing you back safely. I used to wake up late at night and go to our study and stay there reading until I could find something useful. Then, one day, I did. And just before you left, I programmed the Tardis to run all the calculations. Then life happened and I regenerated, but I’ve never forgotten you. This evening, the old girl showed me she was ready.”

“Thank you.”

The Doctor looks at River and studies her face. “I’m sorry again…”

“Don’t be. I understand. And I love you more for all of it.”

And they kiss and they cry (Bow-Tie would be dying right now) and they go to their bedroom to make up for all of those years of being apart, of longing, and missing, and hurting.

And that night, and all of the following ones, they can’t leave each other’s arms. They love each other as if the world would end. Because for River, for quite a long time, the world did end. She would never admit it to Petite, but that young Doctor, who didn’t know who she was, left her with a heartache. The minute she realized he hadn't the faintest idea who she was, her heart broke into a billion pieces. She knew that that would happen eventually, but she wasn’t ready for the amount of hurt that it would bring.

Then, she had to die. She sacrificed herself for him. And she did it gladly, for fear that if she didn’t, he would change everything he’d ever meant to her. And she knew in her heart she wouldn’t change anything at all, not even the pain she felt sometimes. After so long in the digital world, she started believing he’d forgotten her there. She was embarrassed to admit that she even believed he’d overcame whatever pain he was feeling, and left her there for good. 

But, being the Doctor, and life with him as complicated as life can be, there she is, all changed, just to shake River's whole wide world again. It’s unbelievable how impossible her Doctor is. The lengths she is capable of going to save the ones she loves. So River loves her more fervently, more passionately, more strongly. And the Doctor is so intoxicated she can’t bear the thought of leaving her just for a few seconds. They spend all of their time embraced and exchanging promises again, like they used to do when the Doctor was Silver Fox.

On one of those days, lying around each other, River asks the Doctor something that was bothering her for quite a while.

“Were you alone, my love?”

“When?”

“When you regenerated.”

“I saw you in my head that day.”

“Was it lonely?”

“Yes. But he gave me something to look for. He told me to be nice, you know, Scotsman. And I’ve been trying to live up to his words.”

“He was that sort of person.”

“He made it possible to bring you back.”

“And I’m so glad he did.”

“Did you know I traveled with Nardole?”

“You did?” River can’t help but giggle. “Don’t tell me you traveled with Ramone, too.”

“Oh, no! I stuck Nardole's head in his body again. Well, Scotsman did. He used to annoy the hell out of Furry Brows. Now that I think about it, it was quite funny.”

“I’m sure he did. He used to annoy the hell out of everybody, to be completely honest with you.”

“But he helped me get through, in those days without you. He put a lot of sense into me. And kept me company. I even had a pupil during those days, you’d love her, name was Bill.”

“What happened to her?”

“Oh, she died. Became a Cyberman. We fought side by side. I just hope in the end she didn’t suffer.”

“I’m so sorry, sweetie.”

“It’s fine. Now, let’s talk about nice things, shall we?”

“Sure. Whatever you’d like, dear.”

“I know how you love to be with me.”

“You aren’t wrong.” River chortles.

“But I also know how you used to love to teach. So, I was able to contact Luna, you know, and they said they’d have you back whenever you felt like returning.”

“You didn’t! Seriously?”

“Yeah, they said you were the foremost professor of Archaeology there and since you left they haven’t been able to find someone as good as you.”

“Oh, Doctor. I’m speechless.”

“Ah, It’s nothing, really. They’re anxious to have you back as soon as you’re ready.”

“What about us?”

“What about it?”

“There’s no point in me returning to you only to just go away.”

“I thought you’d want that.”

“I do. But I don’t want to leave you and wait for God only knows how long til we see each other again.”

“Uhmmm… okay. I know what we can do. I’ll drop you at Luna, you’ll have your regular classes and whatever it is that you archaeologists do when you’re not teaching and whenever you’re free, and I’ll be sure to keep tabs, I'll go and get you and we'll enjoy our time together.”

“Will it work… for you?”

“For me? River, I love you, you’re my wife.” The Doctor holds River’s face in her tiny hands. “You’re my everything. I know how much you miss being in the field. And my other selves weren’t very keen on Archaeology, I know, but I do respect you, and I want you to have everything you couldn’t because of… well, because of me! Now, the question is, will it work for you?”

“Well, yes! Yes, it will. But won’t you be alone when I’m at Luna?”

“Nah, have my fam. You’ll meet them, they’ll love you.”

“And I’ll love them.”

“So, ready?”

“What, now?”

“Well, technically we still have a few months before the term starts, but you still have to accept the invitation, you know.”

“Doctor," River shakes her head, baffled, "I so hate you.”

“No, you don’t.”

The months pass and River cannot stop beaming with joy. The Doctor is also head over heels and River’s joy makes her feel all the more content and glad that Furry Brows first thought about bringing her back. And River’s excitement is the solution to all her troubles.

The beginning of the first term arrives and the Doctor drops River at Luna, a bit sad for the time they’ll be apart. 

“I will miss you, wife.” She gives River a quick kiss and hugs her.

“And I you, sweetie. But you have a time machine, you can be here tomorrow.”

“I don’t want to spoil things by using time travel with us.”

“Well, then you’ll have to wait.”

“Waiting is boring.”

“Then, I really don’t know how to help.”

“Wait! What if…” The Doctor breaks the embrace and looks at her, her mouth open, looking a bit mad, the face of someone who’s just had the most brilliant idea of their whole life.

“What, Doctor? Why are you making that face?”

“What if I come live here with you?”

“What about your companions?”

“Oh, yeah.” She looks bothered and frowns. “I know! I'll live here with you, but we'll go back to Earth sometimes, you know maybe some days after dropping them there, and take them on adventures and stuff, and then we'll return. You, me, the Tardis, we'll run.”

“Looks like time travel to me.”

“Ah, but only with them.”

“Shouldn’t you at least tell them you are okay?”

“Oh yeah, might as well. Wait a sec.” The Doctor takes a phone out of her pocket and River stares at it, because it’s one of those mobiles you have to flip open, and starts laughing heartily.

“What?”

“Doctor, people haven’t been using phones like that since the early 2000s.”

The Doctor feels a bit annoyed, "It's a great design!" 

Back on Earth, Yaz’s phone rangs. She picks up at once. “Hey, Doctor, what’s up?”

“Hey, Yaz, how are things?”

“Great! How are you?”

“Oh, great! Positively amazing! Hey, how long has it been since I dropped you guys home?”

“A few days.” She looks at River and says, giving one of those weird smiles of hers, where her whole face frowns, "A few days!"

“Hello?” Ryan is now on the line.

“Hey, Ryan, how’s Graham?”

“Hey, Doc!” So was Graham.

“Hey, guys, I miss you. Look, I just wanted to let you know I'm fine, okay?”

“Anything wrong, Doc?” Graham sounds worried, as usual. If the entry for worried in dictionaries had a picture, it would be Graham’s. "'Cause whenever you call us saying everything's fine is 'cause everything's wrong."

“No, no. Nothing’s wrong. It’s great, actually, totally great! Now... Say hi to my wife!”

“Your what?!” Yaz and Ryan shout.

“Oh, yes… So, I may have forgotten to mention her.” River is now glaring at the Doctor, so she whispers a sorry and continues, “I’ll put you guys on a video call, wait a sec.” She sonics the phone and waves at them.

“So, guys, here’s my one and only, emphasis on one and only,” and she smiles in River’s direction, “wife! I present to you River Song.”

“Hello, guys! Good to meet you.”

Ryan and Yaz greet her heartily, even though Yaz is feeling a bit jealous (she wonders why), but Graham is extremely confused with the fact that the Doctor has a wife. “Doc, how did you manage get married in such a short time?”

“Long story, Graham.” The Doctor is radiating.

“Graham, it’s complicated.” River could kill the Doctor sometimes.

“Yeah, I met River when I was this tall bloke. Then, we lived together when I was this angry Scotsman. Then, she died. Bit awkward, I know. But now, we're together again.”

“What the heck, Doc?” Graham is abashed.

"She's beautiful! You're beautiful, River!" Yaz is just the greatest. 

"Yeah, she fine." Ryan can't stop smiling at River.

"She is, isn't she?" Now, the Doctor can't stop smiling, too. 

“Don’t listen to her, Graham, she can be a bit obnoxious.” Graham agrees with River, and she continues, "And she also just happens to have a very poor memory. She never mentions things of the utmost importance, you see." The Doctor pretends she didn't listen to anything River said.

“So, guys, it’s great that now you know my beautiful, beautiful wife, but here’s the thing. I’ll tell you all about it next time I’m on Earth, ok? You’ll get to meet her in person. I’ll stay here with her for some time but I promise you’ll see me as quick as you can say Raxacoricofallapatorius.”

“Now she’s just making stuff up,” Graham remarks.

“Now, guys, stay safe. And Graham, don’t kill the vibe, always nice to remind you of that. Bye, guys!”

“Bye, Doctor!”

“Bye, Doc!”

The Doctor turns to River and holds her by the hand. “So, while you go there and do your thing, I’ll find a good spot to park the Tardis. Might as well fix the chameleon circuit so it’ll look like a house again.”

“Right. How on Earth will I know where you are?”

“I’ll come pick you up.”

“You'll fly a house to where we are now?”

“Nooo. I’ll come on foot. It won’t be far.”

“Oh, ok. It’s just that the last time you said you were picking me up, when we were at Darillium, you actually flew the house to where I was.”

“What? That wasn’t me! That was Angry Scotsman.”

“Sweetie,” River bent her head to plant a kiss on the Doctor’s forehead, “they are all you. Never forget that.”

“Yeah, right. So, 5pm on the dot?”

“5pm on the dot. And not a second later!” River kisses the Doctor and enters the building. The Doctor can't stop thinking that once again, life was so, so good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've rewritten the whole chapter because it was awful and because I want to continue writing this. Let's see how this goes.


	5. You and me, some kids and a Tardis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "All that no one sees  
> You see what's inside of me  
> Every nerve that hurts  
> You heal deep inside of me, ooh  
> You don't have to speak  
> I feel"
> 
> Björk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I guess there's so much I want to explore now that I got the hang of writing this fic. I don't know when I'll be posting the next chapter, may be tomorrow, may be in a week or a month, but I'll do it. I think the dynamics between River and Petite are my favorite now, much more than Twelfth with her.

As soon as the Doctor enters the Tardis, she programs the old girl to find a suitable spot to park her. The Doctor proceeds to fly the ship to the place, which happened to be in the middle of a field, not so far from the university.

“Now, let me just fix that circuit.”

She fiddles with cables and plugs and connections and wires. A blue cable goes in a red port and a red cable in a green port, and the whole thing seems to work because she can hear a DING.

“Chameleon circuit activated. Now, let’s see. It blends with the surroundings, but I want a house. So, if I press this button here…”

The Tardis makes a hum. The Doctor smiles and steps outside the ship to see the result.

“Oh, that is really good! River is going to love it.”

She spends her time trying her best not to feel bored, but being herself and with a history of feeling bored pretty easily, she ends up scrolling through quizzes websites and doing every test she finds (she discovered she was an ISFP-T, whatever the hell that meant, and that she was most likely to be the Phoebe of her gang, whatever the hell that meant, too). She also plays some games. She’s recently discovered a new found taste for them and is very fond of Pokémon. During the afternoon she is able to become a Pokémon gym leader and, all in all, she is very proud of her work.

When the time to pick River up finally approaches, the Doctor throws her hands up in the air, shouts “Finally!” and leaves the house. The neighborhood seems nice, full of students and teachers going their own ways. Maybe she could throw a party and get to meet all of them.

While she’s walking a breeze blows and she gets distracted with a strange creature that resembles a bird. All the while she’s smiling. Things couldn’t get any better.

She arrives at the university some 20 minutes before she is supposed to pick River up and proceeds to greet everybody who is leaving the building, in the meantime.

“Hello! Nice hat, loved it!”

“Hi there, waiting for my wife. She teaches here. Archeology. Nasty stuff.”

“Oi! You! Hi to you too!”

While River is leaving the building, she spots the Doctor trying to make small talk with a student, and from his face she can tell he really wants to be far from there. She thinks to herself, “Oh, dear,” and walks towards her wife, who is waving her hands frantically in the air, talking nonstop. River fastens the pace.

“Hello, Doctor, everything alright?” River is panting and looks at the boy with sympathy.

“Hi, River, I was just telling this amazing bloke here how to produce a bear through fissure.”

“I’m sure it’s interesting, honey, but he needs to go home, don’t you, dear?” She moves her lips trying to tell the boy to go away as quickly as he can.

“Yeah, yeah, I have, Professor Song. Bye! Bye to you too.” He walks away as fast as he can, as far away as possible from that mad woman.

“It’s Doctor!” Petite shouts. “It’s Doctor…” She scrunches her face in disappointment. But as soon as she focuses her attention in River, her whole world lightens up.

“Hey, sweetie! How was class?” She bops River’s nose, grinning.

“Ah, it was rather interesting. Gave a lecture on Archeology of the 51st century.”

“Ew, seems pretty boring to me.”

“Only because you are the subject of most of Archeology studies, dear.”

“Oh, well, what can I say? Hard to keep track on everything I do.”

“I’m sure it is, and that’s why I’m the archaeologist here, honey. So I can keep track of all the havoc you wreak out there.”

“Well, most of the times it’s not even my fault and you know it.”

“What’s the plan, sweetie?” River wraps an arm around the Doctor’s shoulder and brings her closer. They start walking back to the Tardis.

“Well, I was thinking maybe you’d like to do something fun.”

“Should I worry? Your idea of fun usually involves getting us into trouble, honey.”

“That’s not entirely true. Just most of the times”

“I’d say 99 per cent of them. What do you have in mind?”

“I thought maybe we could, you know... spend some time together. Chat, drink some tea, dance a little. In this body, I’m a great dancer.”

“Ok, now I’m really worried.”

“What? I am. Ask the fam! I’m such a fun person to be around.” River can’t help but laugh.

“It’s a lottery with you, isn’t it? I never know what surprises await me.”

Most of the times, River enjoyed the surprises. The Doctor’s only regeneration River is not so fond of is her seventh incarnation, mostly because he could be an annoying little mean man. The rest of the regenerations gladly accepted her, and she was able to take all of them to their bedroom in the Tardis. The easiest one was the sixth incarnation, mostly because from his point of view, it was love at first sight. Every time she bumped into him, he’d snog her to death. Then, came her beloved Darillium husband, the twelfth incarnation, the one she was able to share so many happy years. The fact was, loving the Doctor meant accepting that they were never the same twice and that she never knew which incarnation she would meet next.

“Sweetie, you mentioned something about producing bears through fissure.”

“Yes, it’s one of my newly found hobbies.”

Another thing that came with loving this impossible being was that she had to babysit some of the incarnations. The eleventh one was the worst when it came to acting like a normal adult. Maybe she would have to do that now, again.

“How many times have you done that, Doctor?”

“Oh, dunno. Sometimes. Ten… Maybe more. Twenty at the most.”

“Where did you put all those bears, honey?”

“They are around there somewhere.”

“What? In the Tardis?”

“Maybe…” River shrugs and makes a mental note to scan the Tardis for any bears that were roaming loose around the ship.

“Sweetie, we’ll have to fin a place for them to stay. I know how obsessive you can be once you discover something new to do.”

When they arrive home, River puts her things on a bench, and loosens her hair. The Doctor approaches her from behind and hugs her. She missed domesticity. They had months of bliss after she’d freed River from the Library, in the time vortex and then wherever the old girl took them. But having a home again, and being with River once more, that was something she thought she wouldn’t have for quite a long while. She feared River would tell her to go and have her adventures and leave her alone for some time.

“I missed you so much.”

“I’ve been gone for only a few hours, my love.”

“I know. And it was boring.”

“What did you do all that time?”

“Ah, lots of things.”

“Are any of those things related to spending hours looking at Wikipedia pages for gruesome deaths during the Middle Ages?”

“Maybe.” River laughs heartily at that.

“I know what we can do.”

“Is it going to make me blush?”

“Oh, honey, it most definitely will.” She turns around and kisses the Doctor. Then she does something that annoys the hell out of Petite: she picks her up on her arms. And they go the living room.

“Hey! I can walk.” The Doctor always frowns whenever River does that to her. And River has been doing that whenever there’s a chance because she loves to see Petite angry. It’s so cute.

“I know, honey, but you are small and I love carrying you in my arms. Remember when you were the one doing that?”

“I can still do it!”

“Oh, sweetie, I don’t think you can.”

She puts the Doctor on the sofa and says, “Now, you stay there. I’ll make us a cuppa. I may even snog the hell out of you, if you behave.”

“I am… I never… How dare you? I always behave.” The Doctor is dismayed and River walks away to the kitchen, while shouting, “Sometimes I wish you didn’t, honey.”

“So… many students?” Now, they are both shouting.

“Oh, dear, you’d be surprised at the amount of people that actually respect Archaeology and want to study it.” She puts the kettle on the oven and produces some tea out of one of many cupboards.

“Well, people sometimes have weird tastes.” She opens a book that was lying on the coffee table and flicks through it without really reading anything.

“You have weirder tastes, Doctor.”

The Doctor stands up and looks around. It’s been such a long time since she came here. The last being in Darillium. Things are exactly as they were when River left. Even River’s last hand note to Silver Fox. It read ‘I will miss you.’ She didn’t know River had written that to her. Or rather to him. The Doctor couldn’t bear to enter any of the rooms they’d share after River’s departure. Not even when she regenerated. She holds the note to her heart and puts it in one of her pockets, as soon as River arrives with the tea and a plate of Jammie Dodgers.

“Ah, tea, love some tea.” The Doctor sits on the sofa next to her wife. “Love a Jammie Dodger, too. You know me so well.”

River kisses the Doctor’s cheek and grabs one of the mugs. She sips some of the herbal tea and says, “So, tell me. What made you want to stay?”

“You.” The Doctor grabs a biscuit and takes a bite at it.

“No, but, seriously. You changed your mind rather quickly.”

“I missed this. We used to have so much fun together in Darillium.”

“Are you, I don’t know, I’m just theorizing… jealous of him?”

“Of whom? Of Furry Brows? Nah! What makes you think I’d be jealous of that old bloke?”

“Oh, you are! Haha! Honey… we talked about this. They are all you.”

“Yeah, but every regeneration makes me different, so technically I’m a different person. Which means, he got to spend time with you, not me.”

“Oh, sweetie, come here.” She wraps the Doctor in an embrace and kisses her cheek. “You are a ridiculous fool.”

The Doctor returns the embrace and mumbles in River’s ears. “Well… There’s actually another reason why I want to stay.”

River breaks from the embrace and grabs a biscuit. “And what’s that?”

“You know how much I’ve ran from all of this. You also know that hundreds of years ago I used to have a family in Gallifrey. But I’ve never told you about them.”

River has always been curious about this particular part of the Doctor’s life. He never mentioned them to her, not even in Darillium. Only a few people actually knew the story and they are probably long gone by now.

“It’s ok, honey, you don’t need to say anything.”

“But I want to. You deserve to know. He didn’t tell you but I will. The thing is, Time Lords have a different sense of what a relationship tends to be. When we find someone, we stay with that person until he or she regenerates. Then, once the person changes, the spouses have to stand in front of a judge to renew their vows. And that’s where most marriages in Gallifrey end up in divorce. Time Lords and humans share something in common: we are vain. We feel sexually attracted to each other and, just like humans, for us, a healthy relationship relies mostly on partners being able to have a healthy sexual life, and for that to happen, you need to feel attracted to them. Well, you know the whole thing, right? Imagine having to share a bed with someone you don’t feel sexually attracted to. And even though technically we retain the memories of previous incarnations, we do have different personalities and different bodies. It’s a messy and complicated process, Gallifreyan marriage.”

River is staring at the Doctor, nodding to encourage her to continue speaking. The Doctor licks her lips and drinks some more of her tea. She takes the time to organize her train of thought so that River understands every single thing.

“Anyway. I was married hundreds of years ago. She and I, we got married during my first incarnation, you know, the Old Scrawny fellow. We had kids. In their first incarnations they were a boy and a girl, respectively. She had been a man before I met her and, when I did, she was on her second regeneration. I was already a grown up, was in my 70s or so. In the beginning, life was lovely, she made me the happiest man alive. And when our first baby was born, I couldn’t contain tears. Then, came our second child and I knew in my heart that I’d never let them go. Our kids grew up, and then came the grandkids. Susan was my dearest child. I’ve loved her the moment I held her in my arms.”

The Doctor takes a pause and sighs. Remembering these things is hard, but she knows River needs this as much as she needs it, too.

“Doctor, it’s ok, you don’t need to continue.” River holds the Doctor’s hand and squeezes it really hard.

“No, I need to. It’s ok, I’m fine. Anyway… Life happened. My wife and I separated some years after Susan’s birth. That was mostly due to the fact that she became a prominent figure in the Citadel and I was already becoming a revolutionary of sorts. So we parted ways and for quite some time I felt lost. Empty even. Then, some years after, I became depressed and it only got worse once one of my grandkids fell ill and died. There was no regeneration that could cure him of that illness in specific. I felt life was worthless in that hell of a place. I needed a fresh start. I knew Susan wanted to travel, so I decided I needed a ship to take her on adventures, meet new worlds, make new friends. At that time I had a name for myself and was considered one of the main scientists in the Citadel, having helped them engineer the new models of Tardis they were developing at that time. It was pretty easy to just go and steal one for me. I knew for a fact that the older models were just as good as the new ones, and they’d probably not notice one was missing. And the rest is history, as you know. My point…”

River, then, stops the Doctor short, fearing what the Doctor will tell her, or rather ask of her, she already knows. “You really don’t need to say anything, dear.”

The Doctor stares straight into her eyes for support. “My point is I want that again. I want a family. With you. You’ve already shown me that, no matter how much I change, your love just keeps getting stronger and stronger. I’ve never seen anything like that with humans. You, River, will have me no matter what. That’s something not even Time Lords are able to feel for each other, or at least, just a very small percentage may even feel like this, but it’s a rare event.”

“What are you saying, my love?”

“I want you and me and kids. That’s what I’m saying. You know, a proper family.”

“Doctor, that’s crazy.”

The Doctor fixes her gaze on the plate of biscuits. “I know. Sorry, it’s too much, I shouldn’t have suggested.”

“No, it’s crazy because once I tried to tell you exactly what you said now but there never seemed to be an appropriate time for that.”

“When?”

“When we were at Asgard. Actually, I wanted to ask if you thought we could ever have kids one day. It’s just that at that time our timelines were such a mess that I don’t think we’d have been able to be parents. But, yes, I’ve always wanted to. Not with others, only with you.”

“Oh. Right. That’s a relief.”

“Right. How are we going to do that?”

“What? Kids? Well, the old way.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Well, River, you know…” The Doctor blushes. She was never quite good at saying the word.

“You mean through sex?”

“Uhm, well, I know I’m an alien but Time Lords make babies through it, you know that, why are you asking?”  
  
River puts a hand on the Doctor’s shoulder and says the next words as she was explaining something to a 5 year-old. “Honey, we’re both women, you know. We both have wombs and such. How are we going to get pregnant?”

“Oh, don’t worry. That’s not a problem. I’m not entirely a woman, right now, you know.”

“You’re not entirely a woman? Does that mean you have a…”

“Haha, nah, it means I am partly a man inside. I can still impregnate others if I want to. Through regeneration energy. I thought you knew about these things.”

“Well, honey, I do know these things. I’m just trying to make you blush.”

“Oh, shut up.”

River lays her head on the Doctor’s shoulder and both stay quiet. The fact that the Doctor wants this things now makes River’s world tremble. She’s always wanted that but it always seemed so impossible, so unattainable. Was the Doctor going through a phase or something or was she being sincere? She wondered if all those years apart made the Doctor someone better. Was she able to make amends? Or was she still the most wanted alien in the universe? If so, having a family was a risk. Was River prepared for that?

“River?”

“Sorry honey. Got distracted.”

“What do you say?”

“Yes! I want that, too.”

The Doctor smiles and kisses her wife. They remain embraced for a long time, just cherishing each other. They turn the TV on and enjoy a nice evening in each other’s arms, laughing and cuddling and saying silly things. Maybe life was going to be different now. Maybe now they had a chance of making all the wrongs right. Time was just a concept when they had all of it in their hands inside the TARDIS.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a small mention of 'Picnic At Asgard', one of the tales told in the book The Legends of River Song.


	6. The mysteries of love (or how Time Lords make babies)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes a wind blows  
> And you and I float in love  
> And kiss forever in a darkness  
> And the mysteries of love come clear  
> And dance in light  
> In you, in me, and show that we are love"
> 
> Ionnalee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, my, this took an angsty turn that I wasn't expecting. But here it is, the conception scene and some explanation to how Time Lords conceive. I don't know if canon states how it happens, but I tried to make it as sciencey as I can.

River decided that the best course of action regarding a baby Song would be to wait just a bit before the Doctor was absolutely sure she wanted to be a parent again. Mostly it was River’s fear that the Doctor would one day get bored with all of that domesticity and just fly away. So she waited and every day the Doctor tried to persuade her to see things from her perspective. She wasn’t wanted anymore, so their child would be safe. Their timelines were also in sync, so she didn’t need to run from River anymore for fear of messing everything up. Every day she showed River that she was being honest with all her feelings and wishes, planting the seeds of trust that River so needed.

One day, the Doctor decided to take River for a night out in Luna. They went dancing that night and to River’s surprise, Petite was actually not so bad. She did have some awkward moves, but overall, she was able to make the whole place end up on the dance floor. After what appeared to be hours dancing nonstop, they decided to take some rest and recover their breath. “The night isn’t over yet”, the Doctor thought to herself.

“What do you think? Am I good or not?” The Doctor sipped her water.

“Well, I’m quite surprised, Doctor.” River was out of breath and hot from all the dancing.

“Told you. Still have my moves.”

“So you have, dear.” River drank some of her cocktail and held the Doctor’s hand. “So…”

“So…”

“We should do this more often.”

“Oh, we will. I’m thinking of throwing a party and inviting the neighbors.”

“As long as there aren’t gigantic animals roaming around our house.” The Doctor frowned at that and stared at River. “What?”

“Gigantic animals are what makes a party a party.”

“I still have to find all those bears, honey. Don’t think I’ve forgotten.”

They managed to dance some more and at the end of the last song they were exhausted but ecstatic. They went home singing and bumping their hips. They looked like two drunken idiots, after a long night of partying like hell, even though they weren’t drunk at all. The Doctor only had water and River’s cocktails weren’t enough to make her even a bit dizzy.

They arrived home, showered and went to bed. The Doctor realized that it was now or never. She wanted a baby, and she wanted River to be their baby’s mother. She needed River to see that she was being serious about the whole thing. They laid down facing each other, the Doctor’s hand caressing River’s cheeks.

“When are you going to give us a chance?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Of course, River knew what the Doctor meant.

“The baby. I want this. I want this now, with you.”

“Doctor…” River turned to face the ceiling and hesitated before saying the next words. “I think maybe we should see things through, seriously.”

“See what through?”

“You may have had a family once. But then you realized life could be so much more than that. You ran and you’ve never stopped running. I don’t want you to feel the burden of taking care of me or a child, or anything else.”

“Why would it be a burden?”

“Because you aren’t the kind the person that stays put. You like changes.”

“I’ve thought about that. We can do it. We can travel as a family.”

“Are you completely sure of that, Doctor? Are you absolutely sure you are ready for that? A family means commitment, and you were never the one for those kinds of things.”

The Doctor frowned. So that’s what River thought about her. She felt a little sad about it. It wasn’t an understatement, she really didn’t like commitment and even though her companions were her best friends, she was always glad of changes. She has always had families for the briefest amount of times, but she always ran away. Always. No matter what. She never stopped to think about how the others felt about being abandoned. Look at Sarah Jane, and Susan, and other companions. And every time, she found someone new, and every time she left those new people behind without thinking of the consequences. Sometimes they died, sometimes they lived, but one thing was for certain, she always tried to convince herself that by abandoning them or forgetting the ones that died, she was making a huge favour both for them and for herself.

“I mean it. I’m not giving up easily. I want you to be the mother of my children. And I want to be able to show you that we can be a family. A normal family.” The Doctor kissed River. “Please, give me a chance.”

River kissed the Doctor back. And that night they didn’t let go of each other. They loved each other fervently and passionately and the Doctor cared for all of River’s needs, be it kisses, or touches or exchanges of love. And at some point that night, River decided she was ready. So while they were making love, Petite focused all of her regeneration energy on one of her hands. While they kissed and moaned and touched, Petite directed that energy on River’s belly and River opened her eyes. “I love you.”

The Doctor embraced River and they both came. The Doctor opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling while her breath became steady again, one of her hands over River’s curls, who was smiling now.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m splendid. You?” River raised her hear and looked at the Doctor, beaming with pure joy.

“I’m great.”

“So that was it? Do you think it worked?”

“We’ll know in a few hours.”

River fell silent, her head on the Doctor’s bosom.

“I’m not entirely Time Lord, you know that. I have human DNA.”

“Meaning?”

“Human womb.”

“Honey, you were conceived in the time vortex, you share my DNA too. Your body is absolutely the same as mine. You even regenerated. Our bodies are compatible. It would only be a problem if you were completely human.”

“Right. I have to confess I’ve wanted it, but now a bit frightful. What if something happens to any of us?”

“Well, I don’t think anything will happen soon. Let’s just focus on the now, for the moment, dear. We’ll be great, you’ll see.”

“What if any of your foes appear out of nowhere?”

“Well, then we’ll fight them, like we always did. But, as I said, nothing will happen, trust me.”

“Rule number one, sweetie.”

“Oh, damn those rules. I’m not that man anymore.”

"Okay, then."

River turned and laid on the bed facing the ceiling just as the Doctor did. The Doctor tends to lie about many things in order to make people happy. She didn’t want to lie to River anymore, that’s not who wasn’t. She wanted River to feel safe, to know that things would be alright and that their lives wouldn’t be at risk. That man was left behind when Silver Fox decided that kindness was something to strive for whatever the circumstances.

“How long does a Time Lord pregnancy take, Doctor?” River asked the Doctor, while eyeing the stars on the ceiling.

“About three, three and a half months.”

“Really? That’s not long at all.”

“Babies grow faster too. A Time Lord reaches adulthood at the age of 15 years.”

“Will we have time to enjoy our child?”

“Sure. Why? You think you won’t?”

“Dear, I gave you all my regenerations. I don’t know how long I have.”

“Oh, I thought about it all. One thing at a time, River Song.”

They kissed and the Doctor pulled the sheets over them. Being in River’s arms always made her feel safe. She’ll never admit that to River, of course, her pride was too big. She did like her tall and well-built incarnations, but being short and small had its perks, and one of them was disappearing in her wife’s arms. Their height difference wasn’t so contrasting if they were standing next to each other, but River had a muscular body, and when she joked that the Doctor wouldn’t be able to withstand carrying her around like Silver Fox used to, it had some truth in it. She felt annoyed whenever she was carried but deep down inside she kinda digged it. And that’s another thing she will never ever admit to her wife. As for River, she had so many things in her head, she was feeling bewildered. She couldn’t believe that it was actually happening. They were doing that. She had to put so many things in perspective. Like, what now? What’s the next step? Can she do this? Can the Doctor do this? Will they really manage? Wasn’t this too much? She felt tired. Soon they both dazed off, in each other’s arms.

A little before dawn, River woke up feeling rather sick. She stood up, her hand covering her mouth and ran straight to the bathroom. The Doctor sat up and shouted, “River, everything ok?” She stood up and went after her wife to offer some moral support. River can’t help but remember that the last time she found herself vomiting her entrails was when she went to a crazy party in Aldebaran. She had been drinking herself to death and she can’t recall to this day all the details of the madness that went on during the whole event. She remembers vaguely that the Doctor’s tenth incarnation was with her that night. That man knew how to party. She promised herself she would never do that again.

She did.

When she looked up at the door, the Doctor was standing in her pyjamas, looking worried. “Feeling fine?”

“I’m ok, honey. It’s okay.”

River took a deep breath, eyes were watering. “I think that’s it. I’m feeling a bit better now.”

“Come here.” The Doctor helped River stand up. She washed her face and gargled with some mouthwash to take the bad taste out of her mouth.

“Now, I just want to make sure it did work. Come with me, babe.” The Doctor ran towards the Tardis console.

River followed her and saw that Petite was programming the Tardis scanner to work as an ultrasound machine. She asked River to stand behind the monitor. “Right, now, just a moment.” She adjusted the settings and pressed a button. And then, a wide smile spread throughout her whole face.

“What, Doctor?”

“We’re pregnant, dear. Let me freeze the screen to show you.” She pressed another button and the image stopped. “Come here.”

River walked towards the Doctor and looked at the screen. And there it was, a tiny little thing, still in the very early stages of Time Lord embryo, but already beginning to have some kind of form. So small, yet, already so magnificent.

“Oh, Doctor. That’s incredible. It really is happening.”

“I know. Our own Time Lord baby Song.”

“It’s beautiful.”

“Won’t take long until we’re able to see its face.”

“How long?”

“I’d say a few weeks.”

They spent quite a long time looking at the picture on the screen, words faltering, completely immersed in a sense of both admiration and fright. Being a parent is the most frightening thing that can ever happen in a person’s life. The sudden realization that your life can make another one, and you’ll have to nurture it and love it and bring it up and see them grow up. You’ll have to be the best version of yourself to them, and show that child how much love you are able to give unconditionally. Sometimes even that is not enough. For the Doctor, the fact that she would be able to do all of those things all over again filled her with awe. For River, the whole thing still seemed something out of one of her dreams. She thought she would never had the chance to be a mother. She never had a mother figure, even though Amy existed and was in touch with her. She felt so overwhelmed, she cried.

“What happened, River?”

“I’m sorry, my love. They’re happy tears, I swear.”

“There’s something else bothering you, tell me what it is.”

River paused for an instant. “Will I be like Amy?”

“Of course you will be like Amy, your mother was the best thing that could ever have happened to both of us.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Nothing will happen to our baby, I promise.”

“Can you really promise me that, Doctor?”

“Those days are long gone, my love. Nothing evil can reach us.”

“How can you be so sure there isn’t a single one of them out there?”

“I made sure there wasn’t. I’m different, I swear to you. My past selves, they were keen on keeping our enemies close at hand, full of hate, and ready for waging war at any given moment. I’m not that anymore. I am not them, but you never listen to me. You keep insisting they are me, but I am not them. I am me. This is me now. This person standing right here in front of you. She is here to make amends, and make life, not take it.”

River hugged the Doctor and they stayed like that for a long time. “I am really sorry for everything I did. For every single thing my other incarnations made you go through. I wish I could turn back time and be better. I wish I were better then. I wish I didn’t put so many at risk. All the things I had and I lost because I was vain. I wanted to be feared and loved. I wanted the universe to adore me, that was my fuel. That was what kept me doing the things I did. And I never cared for others, only me. I never cared for you.”

River broke free from the embrace and furrowed her brows. “Don’t say that. Look at what we’d built in Darillium.”

“And it wasn’t enough. It will never be. Ever.”

River wiped away her tears and breathed deeply. “It’s been long since I cried like that. I’d forgotten what it felt like. ” She composed herself and sat down, her arms on her knees. The Doctor sat next to her and wrapped her arm around her shoulders. River looked at her and continued:

“I know you were all of those things. And sometimes I did wish I’d never met you. I hated you so much so many times. There were days I used to ask myself what I was doing with my life. All the loss and the longing and all the pain. Hell, I was in prison because I couldn’t risk losing you. I was such a fool. I’ve loved you with such intensity that sometimes I wished I could just erase you from my mind, so I wouldn't feel a single thing anymore. I know you didn’t care for me in the beginning. No…” She stopped whatever it was the Doctor was going to say, “Let me finish. I... You despised me. You didn’t marry me because you liked me, because you didn’t, my love, no matter how much you pranced around bragging to whoever you wanted that I was your wife. I was a lost girl and you were my first true love. A fool, head over heels for you. Chin Boy wasn’t the type for love, I know that. He may have liked me in the end, but he didn’t show me he cared. Then came him, the old man. He came to me for rebound, no matter how much he said he adored me. And as much as I’d like to believe that he stayed those 24 years with me out of love, I can never not think that he may even have loved me the way he said, but deep down inside he longed for another. I gave myself to him, with all my heart. God, I gave him every tiny bit of me. I'd give him the world, if I could. And everything I gave him, I gave it gladly, because I’m a ridiculous woman who only wanted to be loved. Just a little of his love. Even just a fraction of it was enough to make me so happy I could die. Did you know I left him a message just before I went away? I told him I’d miss him.”

The Doctor was crying now.

“I’ve found it.”

“Did you know I mourned you for a decade before I went to the Library? I couldn’t find anything about you post-Darillium. It was as if you went off radar. It broke my heart that you didn’t say goodbye that day.”

“I’m so sorry. I really am.” River laid the Doctor’s head in her lap while she wept, and stayed in silence for a moment, before she continued.

“Don’t be, love. It’s okay. I understand. But you need to know I am a person, too. I have feelings. And you hurt me the way I imagine I hurt you, too, but I always forgave you completely because you're worth it. I guess that’s the beauty of our relationship, right? You used to hurt me, and I gladly forgave you.”

The Doctor wiped away the tears. “No time can make up for what I was, but I like to think I am the best version of myself now.”

“You are, my love. You are here with me.”

“And will be for ever more. You, me and our child.”

River smiled at that. The Doctor sat straight again, and River passed an arm around her waist. They both stared at the monitor again.

“I’m so sorry for making you cry, Doctor.”

“Nah, it’s ok. I needed to hear those things. I want to improve. I don’t want you to feel this way anymore. I want you to see you are loved. By so many and so much, and by no one more than me.”

“Wait. I told you that.”

“Yes, you told me that the day we got married. And I kept it with me, even though you think Chin Boy didn’t. You did make a difference. You kept me going.” The Doctor sighed and continued. “Do you believe what you said about Furry Brows? The rebound thing?”

“I don’t know. But he always mentioned her, you know that.”

“Who? Clara?”

“He was always so fond of her. Not like a friend. Like someone special, someone who changed him, who left a mark so deep in his entrails that he couldn’t contain whatever it was that he felt, even if he didn't remember who she was.”

“He did love her. But he loved you more.”

“Oh, please. Don’t try to make me feel good, Doctor.”

“I’m being truthful. He was the one who thought about bringing you back, you know. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be able to be here by your side having this conversation.”

“Yeah, I know. And I loved our time together. He was my world for 24 years. He gave me so much and asked for so little in return. Now, here I am, with a new version of you, giving me even more than I could ever have imagined it was possible.”

“And I’m not going anywhere.”

“Unless there’s danger lurking somewhere out there in space.”

“Danger can wait for a while. I’m not the savior of the universe.”

“Oh, sweetie, you so are.” River retorted.

“I promise we’ll only travel if we have to, while you’re pregnant. I don’t think it’s a good idea to go anywhere while you’re carrying our baby.”

“What about Ryan, Yaz and Graham?”

“We’ll keep in contact. When the baby’s born we can pay them a visit. As for now, River Song, my beautiful and totally amazing wife, may we go to the kitchen make some tea before you go to your class?”

“Yeah, I would love some tea right now.”

And that day things seemed to be finally cleared up for both of them. River went to the university, a certain relief taking hold of her. The Doctor waited for her again, but this time she decided to act more like a proper adult and less like a lost kid in a playground. She tidied things up, and went after her old cot. She found out the old girl had made a room just for the little one. It was Tardis blue, the walls full of stars. And when she went to pick River up, she made sure dinner was ready so they’d have a nice hearty meal. That night they watched some TV (the Tardis picked the signal from basically all of the channels you could think of), stretched out on the sofa, saying silly things to each other whenever there was a TV commercial. They felt fullfiled, happy that they could finally talk about what they really felt to each other, without fear of judgment or embarrassment. They went to bed feeling that there was nothing to prove anymore. Because there wasn’t. There was only love left and that was what mattered.


	7. I carry you with me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're here in my head  
> Like the sun coming out  
> Ooh, I just know that something good is gonna happen  
> I don't know when  
> But just saying it could even make it happen"
> 
> Kate Bush

A month goes by and the Doctor and River spend that whole month using the ultrasound machine in the Tardis to see their baby growing. Every day there is a little change. Time Lord embryos develop pretty fast just as the Doctor had said, and soon it was already a fetus, with tiny hands and tiny feet, a small little thing, so full of life and love.

“Look at its face, Doctor. It looks like it’s smiling.”

“Do you want to know the gender?”

“Yes, I’m so excited.”

“Me too. Ok, so here it is…” She pauses for dramatic effect. “Ready?”

“Oh, come on, just tell me.”

“It’s a baby…” She can’t stop grinning. “…girl! We’ll have a daughter!”

“Really?!”

“Yes, a little Time Lady coming our way. We should discuss names. I’m thinking of something different…” River looks at the Doctor, a bit of panic going through her whole body at the mention of the word ‘different’ because in the Doctor’s case, ‘different’ means ‘atrocious’.

“Oh, Doctor, what are you thinking of naming our baby?”

“Maybe Agrippina. I like that name.”

“Oh, no way.”

“What?! Agrippina is a beautiful name.”

“I’m sure it was during the middle ages.”

“What? Agrippina is still a great name!”

“No, Doctor, we won’t be naming our baby Agrippina and that’s it. She’ll be bullied at school.”

“Alright. What do you suggest then?”

“Émeline.”

“Émeline?”

“Yes, French for Amelia.”

”Oh, River Song, you have the best ideas. Émeline Song, it’s very poetic.”

“And I was thinking we could use your old Academy name too, since your own name is out of the question.”

“What, Theta Sigma?”

“Yes, I mean, she’s your daughter, too.”

“Émeline Theta Sigma Song. Nice. I like it.”

“I knew you would.”

”Can’t wait to meet little Émeline. Tell her stories, show her all the things in this universe. You, me and her.”

“Me neither, love.”

One day, River has an idea that makes the Doctor quite excited but a bit anxious, too. River knew her father still had his old mobile with him. She knew that because she visited her parents sometimes, to see how things were going with them and Anthony, her adopted brother.

River knew the Doctor still kept Rory and Amy’s number in the Tardis as an emergency contact, so she sent a message to her parents setting up a date for a chat. The Doctor never had the courage to call them after what happened in Manhattan, because she never seemed to find the strength, and feared she would end up crying. The Ponds touched her in a way that made it very difficult to forget everything they still meant to her. They used to be her family during Chinny years. They had been his safe harbor and their departure still made the Doctor desolate.

When Amy answered the call, Petite did cry. Amy was older now. Of course, she was. But the Doctor had never expected that to happen. For her, Amy would always look like that little girl she met that night Sandshoes regenerated to Chinny. Rory got old, as well, his hair already beginning to fade to gray. They looked so happy.

“River, is that who I think it is?”

“Yes, mother, it’s him. I mean, her.”

“Hey, Doctor!” Rory was smiling at the blond creature bawling her eyes out on the other side of his screen. “You changed quite a lot since we’ve last seen you.”

“Amy and Rory. My best mates. My Ponds. I miss you so much.”

“We miss you too, Doctor.” Amy had one of her arms around a young boy who looked 17. “And meet your brother-in-law. Anthony, this is the man we talked about. Or rather, woman.”

“Hey, Anthony! I hope your parents told you good things about me.”

“Oh yes, they are always talking about you. It’s quite insufferable, sometimes.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they are.” The Doctor wipes away the tears and laughs at the face Anthony was making.

“So… blondie… have you been taking good care of my daughter?” Amy says in a Scottish brogue.

“Oi! I’ve always taken good care of her. Also, we have news! Good news, before you feel all preoccupied.” 

“Mother, no need to worry, we’re fine. Seriously.”

“Good. Because my daughter deserves the world, Doctor!”

“Amy, let the Doctor speak. What’s the news, Doctor?” Rory is feeling a mixture of excitement and shock. Excitement at the whole thing – he never thought he’d be speaking to the Doctor again. Shock, because it was actually happening. Amy says:

“Doctor, what have you guys done now?” 

“Well...” She pauses for dramatic effect. “Amy, Rory… Ponds… We’re pregnant.”

Amy’s face is now on the floor. Rory follows his wife as soon as he realizes what the Doctor had just told them.

“But, Doctor, how? You know... You are not a man anymore. How did you do the whole baby making thing?”

“Mom, please…” Anthony puts his hands on his face, in embarrassment.

“Oh, Time Lord stuff. Complicated.”

“Doctor, not to sound too harsh, but are you sure it’s a good idea? I mean, with your own history and how everything in it seems to involve danger?” Rory can’t help but remember the events from Demons Run.

“Nah, I’ve changed, Ponds. I’m a new person with new rules.”

“Mother, father, it’s alright. You don’t need to feel stressed, everything’s okay, there’s no danger.”

“Doctor, what about all of those things that wanted you killed? What about the Daleks and the Weeping Angels? What about the Silence?”

“Ah, nothing to worry about, Amy. I kind of made sure there weren’t any of them lurking around. Once in a while I find a lost Dalek but they’ve stopped buggering me for quite a while.”

“Okay. As long as you promise my grandchild will be safe.” Amy frowns at the sudden realization that she was now a grandmother. “Oh my, I’m a… grandmother. I’m getting old.”

“Don’t listen to her, River. You know how your mother can be.”

“Yeah, don’t listen to mom. She can be quite the party pooper.” At that, Amy retorts:

“Oi, you! Language, mister.” 

River smiles and reassures them, “There’s nothing to worry about, now. We’re safe and living in Luna, mother. I’m still a professor here and The Doctor is off radar. She’s been taking care of me and we’re so very happy.”

“Ponds, let me show your grandchild, now.” The Doctor messes with some buttons, and sends them an image of the ultrasound scan.

“Oh my god, Rory, our first grandchild, look at it. Anthony, you’re an uncle now!” Amy is feeling so amazed and can’t help but smile broadly. Her daughter would have a chance to be what she couldn’t. She feels so delighted at River, glad that things had finally came into place for the Doctor and her.

“It’s a baby girl, mother!”

“Have you thought about names?”

“Émeline. It’s your name in French.”

“Oh! I'm lost for words now. What an honor!"

“A very nice choice, indeed.” Rory says, lovingly.

“Mother, I promise that we’re safe. And that your granddaughter will be the happiest little girl, I’ll make sure of that.”

They talk for a whole hour, reminiscing of all the things they went through together. There is so much to be said, and the Doctor is relieved that they only kept the happy parts of all of it with them. That they didn’t blame her for what their lives became. They thanked her for everything, even the sad times. Without the Doctor, their marriage would have fallen apart. She helped them overcome their sorrow, when they realized they wouldn’t be able to have other children. She was the sole reason they got back together and realized their love surpassed whatever regrets they nurtured inside their hearts. When they hang up, the Doctor feels relief overcome whatever other feeling she was having and thanks River for the call. She really needed that. They embrace and stay like this for a long long time, glad that they have each other, and that nothing can break them apart. The Doctor, then, looks at River and states:

“We should celebrate!” She goes to the console and starts typing frenetically.

“What are you doing, Doctor?”

“Remember I told you I wanted to throw a party? Well, I’m throwing a party!”

“What? When?”

“Not today because it’s Tuesday and you know how I feel about Tuesdays. Dreadful day! I’m thinking maybe on Saturday.”

“Ok. Right. Uhm, should I fret about anything at all?”

“Like what?”

“Like, I don’t know, giant things walking around during said party?”

“Oh, don’t worry! I’ll make sure they aren’t hostile.”

“Oh, my... So what are you typing there?”

“Just the invitations. I’ll send them to all the neighbors.”

“What? All of them? You do know we have a lot of them.”

“Yes, I do and they are all invited to our little gathering.”

“I wouldn’t call it little, honey.”

The Doctor presses a button and sends all the 342 invitations. The replies are instant.

“Right, so, we have a huge party to prepare, babe. Lots of balloons ‘cause I love them, a DJ, food, lots of hanging decorations, and a giant turtle ‘cause I love a cool giant turtle.”

“You’ll be tidying everything up afterwards.”

“Ah, nothing to worry about. I’ll manage.”

The world could fall but the Doctor was going to make sure that there’d be a party and that it would be epic. She would make sure of that. She only had to find a giant turtle, but that wouldn’t be a problem, ‘cause she had her sources. She wanted them to be free to do what they wanted to do, and have a good time. And that’s what they were going to do: have a good time. They were going to have a party. No matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, the Ponds. I love them so much. Felt like they needed to know the big news.
> 
> Anyway, the final words are basically the lyrics for 'Loaded' by Primal Scream.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fic in Portuguese, felt bored and decided to translate it to English and improve some parts that were too stupid in the original. Hope you guys like it. River and Twelfth had such chemistry on screen, it pains me not to see more episodes with these two loving birds, so I live off everything you guys write about them and it has made my life 1000x better. To all the guys who wrote about these two, thank you so so much. <3


End file.
